Sunday, January 16, 2011
Day 50: Softest Penguin Socks
Once when I was a small child I was using a public restroom's handicapped stall as it was the only one open. I was a spindly little skinny thing and was maybe around the age of 7 or 8. So Gangly Girl walks into the handicapped stall with the GIANT toilet. I then proceed to undo my pants, which people usually do when they are about to use the washroom. I realized in this moment that getting up on the toilet would take a little bit of a jump up. Or at least I thought so. Looking back now I imagine I could have just sat down like a normal person, but I decided to do a little jump. So Gangly Girl, with her pants down, does a little hop-jump to get onto the toilet. Somehow my skinny little butt ended up a little bit underneath the toilet seat on one side and because I had hop-jumped I pushed the sides of the toilet seat down with my hands as my butt made contact. What ended up happening was that I pinched what little fat I had on my upper right thigh between the toilet bowl and the toilet seat. I screamed bloody murder when it happened, quickly repositioned myself and proceeded to bawl my little eyes out (not an unusual occurrence, if I'm being honest). I can only imagine what the other people in the bathroom thought of the loud scream quickly followed by hysterical crying. I personally have never been in a bathroom when someone else has made those noises from another stall. Embarrassing, to say the least, but as a child you don't get embarrassed as easily. Regardless, I ended up with an instant bruise that was bigger than my fist. It was first a bright shade of blue, which quickly turned to a deep purple. Months later I still had a faint yellow/greenish bruise.
I have learned my lesson. Don't jump on toilets.