Sunday, June 12, 2011

Day 180: White Ruffles

I have thought many times in my life that I'm a lot like an onion. I think I've heard this in movies before and maybe even songs. But it feels so true.

Onions have this flaky exterior. Sometimes it's hard to break through it because it comes off in very small pieces. Other times you peel back and it almost all comes off at once. On the outside I have my "flaky" exterior. This is manifested in the brave faces I put on when hurting inside, the small talk I partake in, the giggles that I let out that never turn into real laughter.

Once someone gets through that initial layer there are many more layers underneath. They are raw. They are often tough to break apart. Sometimes they make you cry. But mainly, they represent a multitude of layers in my person that can be revealed when the flaky stuff is gone. My thoughts, my dreams, my fears, my experiences.

One by one these layers can be peeled away to get to the core. That middle tightly-wound section that represents my heart. My core being. My inner workings. My soul. This is a part that so few will ever know. This is understanding how and why I work the way I do. Understanding where I'm coming from. Knowing all my idiosyncrasies and realizing that they make up who I am as a whole.

I try to remind myself everyday that everyone is just an onion. Some people we will never even scratch the surface of the outer layer, no matter how hard we try. Others we will peel back layers only to find their rotten core. And still others we will peel and see their inner workings and their true heart.

I appreciate those who take the time to get past the superficial outer layers in order to truly find who I am.


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