Saturday, November 27, 2010

Day 4: Hearts

Today my socks have hearts all over them. I think I got these for Christmas from my Mom at some point. Possibly not though, I can't really remember. They are very cute and cheery! 

Let me just pour my own heart out a little bit here. After speaking on the phone with a very close friend about our love lives, it is very apparent to me that as humans, we are desirous of giving and receiving love. Much like my post a couple of days ago there is the special love of a family, and the love of friends that have such a great impact on us. But, most of us also desire for a romantic, deep, and personal love with another person. 

In my dating life I have found that dating now that I'm older is much more difficult than it was when I was younger. When you are in high school or the first few years of University there are so many people around you all the time that dating is easy. It's a "he likes me", "I like him", kind of thing and that's really all you need to form the basis of a short-term (but we fool ourselves into thinking it's long-term) relationship. While that is great and fun, there are few people who marry those initial dating partners. I'm happy for the ones that do though - how amazing is it to get it right on the first try?!

For the rest of us that didn't marry our first loves, or even our second or third loves, there is still that deep-seated desire to find the "right" person, whether or not we consciously acknowledge this desire in our day-to-day lives. It is from this thought pattern though that I can't help but wonder why people don't seem to go on more dates. In movies, a 'dating' life is when you are single and you get asked out by a guy at, it seems, every turn. Where are these men in real life? I personally don't think I have ever been asked out to even coffee by a man with the intention to date me. I have been out for coffees, dinners and lunches with male friends where it's clear that there is no intention of dating each other, and that's fine. But when did men stop being gutsy enough to ask for a girl's attention? This whole phenomenon of women wearing the pants is just not my style, and therefore I wait. It's not a complacent, uninterested waiting. It's not laziness. It's a 'God is in control of my life and he'll give me the desires of my heart, in his time' kind of waiting. 

My advice to married couples: If you say you will set someone up with someone else: do it. Follow through. There is nothing worse than being told repeatedly "Oh I know the BEST guy/girl for you" and then never having an introduction happen for either person to decide if they're interested. If you are not willing to follow through, don't say anything at all.

My advice to single girls: Don't lose heart. God hears us when we are weary and he hears our prayers. He knows our desires, but we need to trust him enough to take care of those desires in his timing (not ours!), and trust that he is listening and understands. Easier said than done, to be sure, because faith can be messy. Sometimes we are mad at God for not giving us what we want right now, sometimes we are selfish, and sometimes we just want to scream because it can be hard to trust. He is there through it all. Listening. Comforting. Restoring. Talk to him.

My advice to single men: Be brave. Be courageous. Be a man. Ask girls on dates. Seriously, girls want to be asked. Even if she isn't interested, you tried and can now move on to someone worthy of your love and affection, instead of wasting your time on 'what if's'. Let God guide your decisions so that you can be the spiritual leader the Lord has called you to be in the relationship you finally enter into. 

Ok, now that I've laid that all out on the table, I must go and study.


  1. I couldn't agree more <3

  2. You are amazing princess "D". I love watching the wonderful person in you evolve. Much love. PS I am working on the twelve pairs of sox of Christmas.

  3. That's amazing, Nana! Thank you so much!! :)

  4. thanks for the encouragement lydia! :)
    i've really enjoyed reading your blogs, and cant wait to see you at christmas break!


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